I got just a wee bit melancholy this morning.
It has to do with the “teenager”…again.
Maybe it was the e-mail from a college buddy last night telling me about how she’s helping her oldest child prepare College applications.
Maybe it’s because J is still not interested in inviting school friends over after school or on the weekends.
Maybe it’s because he says he doesn’t want to go trick-or-treating…because he doesn’t have anyone to go with.
Maybe it’s because he “turned down” an invitation to a Halloween party and said “no” to an invite to go trick-or-treating with another new family…also from Virginia.
(He has, however, said that he wants to dress like “Saw”!? for Halloween. For the record, he has never seen the movies, regardless of how much he CLAIMS that he wants to see them.)
Maybe it’s because he’s become a major chair potato…watching too much TV or playing games too frequently on my laptop.
Maybe it’s because my once active son who loved playing outside and doing something, rather than sitting around, has become the aforementioned chair potato.
Maybe it’s because he says it’s “too cold” to do anything outside and if S and I want to go hiking or ‘just see the sights,’ he’s not interested.
Maybe it’s because he says “it’s too sunny” to doing anything outside.
Maybe it’s because he’s become so indifferent…to everything that he once enjoyed and embraced back home.
Maybe it’s because “I” worry…that he’s lonely, when in fact…he’s not.
Maybe this is what happens when one turns 13.
Maybe this is what happens when a 13 year old moves away from the one-and-only place…and the people…they know and love.
Maybe I’m just worrying about a non-existent “shoe falling,” as J seems to have adjusted just fine and seems quite happy.
I just don’t know.
Thirteen-age-hood is new and unfamiliar territory and I don’t have my friends to compare notes…to share what is---or isn’t---normal 13 year old behavior…or just to commiserate.
Or maybe, this is just really…the twilight zone.
It’s happened you know…to other parents of thirteen-year olds.
doodoodoodoo
doodoodoodoo
Poor guy. It can be rough going away to new places. I can't imagine what it must be like to be 13 and have to put yourself out there to meet new people and make new friends. 13 is such an awkward age as it is.
ReplyDeleteIt's me again (Ruby's Vikki). We are dealing with the "13 yr old Creature" as well. Colin can tend to be shy as well, but sports have really helped him. Maybe J can find one that he really enjoys. Or other extracurricular activity. I think the team dynamics can really help get them out there. It puts a group of boys with a similar interest together. I sympathize with you from a far. It's tough enough with these teenage boys, and moving isn't easy. It may take time but it will get better! Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteHmm... He sounds like he is retreating into his own world where it is 'safe'. I think it's natural - with all the changes...
ReplyDeleteI agree with the 2 previous posters... Somehow to put him with like minded 'creatures':)
What about a volunteer job? Does he like animals, or books, or art? Some places love to have 'help' a couple hours a week: book store, animal shelter, or even Art Center... just thinking out loud here...
Big hugs to you both.